Tales from the Nipplegate
Okay, so I'm doing my usual celebrity manhunt, when I stopped by the pages of Oh No They Didn't!. What more do I see than Mariah Carey up in some hanging-baby-Blanket balcony with her areolas posing for the 'razzi. This bitch is on some kind of advanced futuristic cocaine - vaporizing them brain cells one after the other.
Rihyonce' Knowles @ Selfridges in Manchester
Ashanti @ Sucker Free on MTV
Lord, can someone pass Ashanti a tall glass of lemon scented bleach on the rocks, please? I'm ready for her to get it over with.
Oh, I see Rihanna has finally found her calling as an annoying employee in the perfume department of a major retailer. Wow, I always wanted to backslap one of them bitches. How convenient.
Snoop Gets His Ass Arrested Again!
Oh my goodness. Get a weed/weapon-carrier, Snoop! I know you have some broke ass cousin who will tote around your incriminatory foolishness for $3.75/hr and a weekly Snickers bar. I mean, don't we all?
Rapper Snoop Dogg was arrested Tuesday night for allegedly possessing drugs and a firearm.
Detectives from the Burbank Police Department served a search warrant on Snoop, whose real name is Calvin Broadus, outside NBC studios in Burbank at approximately 7:30 p.m. this evening. Police say they found the rapper in possession of cocaine, a firearm and a large amount of marijuana. He was also cited for allegedly having a false compartment in his vehicle.
[ source ]
Monday, November 27, 2006
The War of the Skeezers
Friday, November 24, 2006
Hip Hop Is Dead Cover
Rihanna in Concert
Wednesday, November 22, 2006
Can I Take Ya' Order?
Now, Ms. Banks knows that her big ass head is not going to fit inside that tiny window. Then, Janet is going have Jermaine riding around the drive-thru all day asking for a McChicken with a side of badoosie. That episode is going to be a mess.
The concept came up after Jackson told Banks she'd really like to experience what it's like to "work the window at McDonald's" during a recent appearance on the former model's talk show. And Banks is now determined to join the pop superstar for an upcoming TV taping.
Jackson says, "I would love to do that... I think we would be good."
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
Cassie's Moves Foward
[ spotted @ Hip & Pop ]I'll admit it - Cassie is definitely a fighter. After all the negative publicity thrown her way, she is still determined to make it in the music industry. Here she is sharpening up her vocal skills (a very necessary task in her case) with her new coach, Ron Grant. Guess what...she actually sounds like a singer. Jiminy Cricket, I guess wishing on stars really does work. The only problem that I think she'll have to face in the near future is getting the fans to take her seriously and give her another chance. I mean, once you suck a penis, your fanbase is bound to make a considerable drop.
There Is A God
"Friday night at the Frank Black show at House of Blues on Sunset, the staff at the queue outside were trying to give away tickets for Kevin Federline's November 22 concert there. Several of them had large stacks of tickets and were pleading (with little success) for incoming concert-goers to take a few tickets." [ source ]
Go 'Head Girl!
All I'm saying is, it seems that Big Tigger likes his daisies kissed by the sunshine.
...or maybe he just farted.
Monday, November 20, 2006
Omarion - Ice Box
Apology Not Accepted
Now, the old Seinfeld cast member is attempting to make an apology to the men and all of his fans on The Late Show with David Letterman. The episode, which should broadcast tonight, features a quote from Michael saying:
“…You know, I’m really busted up over this and I’m very, very sorry to those people in the audience, the blacks, the Hispanics, whites – everyone that was there that took the brunt of that anger and hate and rage and how it came through, and I’m concerned about more hate and more rage and more anger coming through, not just towards me but towards a black/white conflict.
Thursday, November 16, 2006
Iron Mike Turns Prostitute
Former boxing champion Mike Tyson is to become a male escort after agreeing to work at legendary Hollywood madam Heidi Fleiss' new legalized brothel for women. Fleiss bought 60 acres of land in Nevada, and his work is scheduled to begin on Heidi's Stud Farm.
She has high hopes for Tyson, once heavyweight champion of the world - despite the fact he is a convicted rapist.
She says, "I told him, 'You're going to be my big stallion.' It's every man's fear that their girlfriend will go for Mike Tyson."
Tyson, 40, adds, "I don't care what any man says, it's every man's dream to please every woman - and get paid for it." [ source ]
I thought the OJ Simpson story was bad, but this shit is mindboggling. Why would any woman request a romantic night alone with Mike Tyson? All his bitches are gonna be going home with chipped teeth, swollen eyes, and one and a half ear. Pray for the fate of the world, please.
.. New Music ..
This is a new record off of Timbaland's upcoming solo album and boy have I heard a lot about it. Guess who's running his lilly white mouth again - Justin "You Took My Dogs" TimberFake. JT made a few subliminal shots at both Janet Jackson and Prince on his verse of the song. Check out his lyrics.
Could you speak up and stop the mumbling/I don't think you're getting clear/Sitting on the top it's hard to hear you from way up here/I saw you tryin to act cute on tv "just let me clear the air"/We missed you on the charts last week/Damn that's right, you wasn't there.
If sexy never left, then why's everybody on my shi-it-it?/Don't hate on me just because you didn't come up with it/So if you see us in the club go on and walk the other way/Cuz our run will never be over, not at least until we say.Okay, so I'm on my way to Los Angeles to plant a bomb in this whiteboy's scalp. Who wants to come? I don't know if anyone else has noticed, but this punk bitch has been talking a whole lot of trash about other artists ever since SexyBack. How dare you disrespect two black music legends who bascially paved the way for you! If it wasn't for Janet and Prince your ass would still be sticking Blow Pops up Lance Bass' bootyhole for recreation. This is what happens when you give wigger a ghetto pass. I'm out to destroy you Justin!
Monica - Dozen Roses
spotted @ Crunk & Disorderly
I'm offended by this song. All I'm saying is, if a girl tells me that I remind her of her Gucci shoes and that we're tighter than the jeans on her ass, she's probably calling me gay. Monica is rude as hell. Suppose I tell my girlfriend that I remind her of a Corona beer bottle or locker room sweat, and that we're tighter than the condom on my dick. I'd get a double backhand slap. Sheesh!
Monday, November 13, 2006
.. New Music ..
Play Me: Nas - Black Republican (feat. Jay-Z)
This is the record that the world has been waiting on. It's off of Nas' upcoming album, Hip-Hop Is Dead, and yes, it's hot! This clip is only a radio rip, so the quality is poor, but you can still get a grip of what the track is hitting with. I can't wait for the Nas album to drop in December.
Play Me: The Game - Wouldn't Get Far (feat. Kanye West)
This is also a hot song. Although I can't stand The Game's personality, I have to admit that the brother knows how to make a decent record. "Wouldn't Get Far" is basically about industry hoes, groupies, and golddiggers, so of course Kanye had to grace the track. Jayceon was not afraid to name names either. Ooh!
Play Me: Cherish - He Said, She Said (feat. Nephu)
Excuse me while I yawn. This is an unreleased track by Cherish and it's pretty damn boring. I don't think these ladies will even see a sophomore album. No wonder they're feeling unappreciated.
Here We Go Again
PETA can sit and take a breather from chasing down Beyoncé over her fur fetish, because P!NK is ready to take her turn at chomping at homegirl. Check out what the pop star had to say:
Alright, not that I'm condoning the usage of fur, but let's be serious. Beyoncé isn't the only celebrity who wears the stuff. Why isn't anyone cursing out Cam'ron, Wendy Williams, or Kimora Lee? Anyway, I'm sure Be' is somewhere sipping on some mimosa while Mama Tina is setting up her plan to burn P!NK at the stake.
"(Beyoncé) is a bitch! I only hope she gets bit on the ass by whatever animal she wears. Some of the practices are so cruel and as a celebrity you have a responsibility to think about the message you're sending out by wearing fur. People will think it's ok or cool, but it's not."
Captain Super Save-a-Ho
Okay, if you really want to help Carmen, what you need to do is dump that bitch in some disinfectant and drop her ass off at church. Ballin!
BET Hip-Hop Awards - Red Carpet
Here's a clip of Diddy making a guest appearance on Jimmy Kimmel Live! last week. You have to check out the spoof he did of Faith Hill and Kanye West's bitter reactions to the awards they recently lost. It wasn't really funny, but it was cold-blooded, and I like that! The rest of the show was nothing new.
Saturday, November 11, 2006
Gwen Stefani - Wind It Up
spotted @ Straight Outta NYC
Am I wrong for saying that I'd smash Gwen Stefani in a heartbeat? I just got a sudden urge today. Hmm...whatever?
Well, my newfound crush on the pop star isn't going to give her a free ride through The Fury. I love the song, but I don't like this video. It's too quirky for me and the fact that Gwen and her cronies raided Janice Combs' wig crypt for props is just plain wrong. I would have liked to see Pharrell make somewhat of an appearence in the video as well. I did, however, enjoy the choreography, which I had been looking foward to seeing. So, Mother Stefani could have done better. I'll be watching...from the front and the back.
Friday, November 10, 2006
Beyoncé to Play Gay?
I'm not sure if I believe this mess. I highly doubt Tina "Wicked Witch" Knowles will allow her oldest daughter to play a pearl-sucker onscreen. I wouldn't have a problem watching that flick, but this rumor just doesn't sound plausible. Besides, Be' can do way better than Eva Mangoria's corkhead ass.
The new film Tipping The Velvet that tells the tale of an 1890s music hall star and her lover, will see Sofia Coppola wearing the director's cap."Yes it's true, we're talking about doing that. It's such a wonderful novel, a beautiful love story," Contactmusic quoted Longoria as saying.To which Knowles added: "We've had Brokeback Mountain so the time is right for this divine novel to get the same treatment." [ Destiny Vault ]
Gerald Levert 1966 - 2006
R&B star, Gerald Levert, passed away due to an apparent heart attack in his sleep on November 10, 2006; he was 40 years old. Sister 2 Sister magazine reported that Gerald and his father, Eddie Levert of 70's group The O'Jays, had just returned from a 10-day trip to South Africa where they had met with Nelson Mandela. [ source ]
Rest in Peace to one of the best R&B artists to ever live. You will be missed Gerald.
Tuesday, November 07, 2006
Peep these flicks of the Power 105.1 bowling party with Jim Jones. Capo loves to hit the bowling alley, but if you've seen his last DVD, A Day in the Fast Life, then you know he's not very good at it.
BTW: How old is Jha Jha? Bitch, looks like she's pushing 86.
Diddy & Kim on Essence Cover
Is is just me or does anyone else think that Kim Porter looks like a sea monster? Let me stop.
Sean "Diddy" Combs and his baby mama, Kim, are gracing the cover of this month's Essence Magazine. Inside there will be talk about their oncoming twin babies, infidelity, the rumors regarding J.Lo, and why the nigga won't supply her with a wedding ring.
"She deserves to get married, but I’m just not ready."
What are you waiting for? Your first pair of Depends?
The magazine hits newsstands next week.
Katt Williams was arrested yesterday at Los Angeles International Airport for carrying a stolen concealed weapon.
You dumb bastard. Katt must have been smoking some of that Arabian Camel-back weed, because I don't know any right-minded person who would walk into an airport with a weapon - a stolen weapon, at that. I bet security was having a ball shoving rods up this nigga's ass. You're still funny though, man!
Law enforcement sources tell TMZ the arrest occurred at 3 p.m. in Terminal 5. Williams, a popular comedian who recently starred in his own HBO stand-up comedy special, was stopped at the security checkpoint. Security officers found a concealed weapon in his carry-on luggage. The LAPD was called and Williams, who is also a popular rapper, was arrested. Cops determined the concealed weapon was stolen. They also found three additional weapons in luggage that Williams had already checked in. [ source ]
Monday, November 06, 2006
.. Sit Down ..
"I already leaked my album. I already leaked my shit so niggas know what it is now. All they got to wait for is the dirty version. You gotta do that. You gotta give people a sample. It's like selling crack in the 'hood, man. Anybody that ever sold drugs in the hood knows you gotta give a nigga a taste before they buy. I got a formula. ~ The Game on why he leaked The Doctor's Advocate
Someone call Dr. Jenkins LA Institute For The Dumb and pull up Jayceon's transcripts, please. I'm convinced that this nigga is a dropout. He acts like he has his whole career down to a science, when in fact he's just acting like an ass. We all know you want a second taste of 50's pre-cum, but all this ignorance is causing me immense fury. Oh, well. Makes for good posts, I guess. Go back to Cali, Game...and take this bitch with you.
I Must Destroy!
Extra, Extra: Now, I'm hearing that Foxy's album has been axed by Def Jam entirely.
Oh well! Bitch, I don't need ya'.
"The album has been plagued as a result of Foxy's hearing loss, constant legal woes and horrible publicity. Regardless, the label has poured tons of money into her project, pushed the album back four times, and Foxy still hasn't been able to produce anything but embarrassing editorial features." [ source ]
.. Caption This ..
New York's Twin
Sunday, November 05, 2006
Groove Me, Baby!
Ciara is planning to launch an instructional dance DVD alongside her upcoming album that will teach fans all of the wild moves she pulls off in her latest videos "Get Up" and "Promise". I think this is a great idea, because a lot of dancers, as well as regular fans admire Ciara for her jig ability, so I'm sure they will love to train under her guidance. I've always wanted to know how to drop it like it's hot without breaking it like it's frail, if you feel me.
BTW: Make sure you check out the interview my homie Beauty held with Ciara over at Beauty N' The Beat.
.. New Music ..
Friday, November 03, 2006
Kanye's Cry Baby Chronicles
“I haven’t seen (the Justice and Simian video). Possibly it could have been quite good but no way better than ‘Touch The Sky’”
“That was some spread the love bullshit, ‘Oh everyone should have an award’. Please press people print ‘Kanye says f*ck that!’”
With all the irritating bitch fits he has had this year, I think Kanye is eligible for The Fury's Sit Down Lifetime Achievement Award. Then maybe he'll stop whining.
Extra, Extra: Justin TimberFake is pushing the limits of his recently renewed ghetto pass with that flappy little mouth of his. He made a few slick comments about Kanye's incident last night saying, "After the show, Kanye will be in the parking lot accepting awards he did not win. Seriously though, I've got sexy covered, it's good to see someone's doing crazy." I'm going to love seeing John Legend and Farnsworth Bentley tagteam that whiteboy for the love of their man.
Thursday, November 02, 2006
Kiss & Make Up
Shareefa - Cry No More
spotted @ Beauty N' The Beat
If anyone ever finds Mary J. Blige and Keyshia Cole bound and gagged in a storage closet somewhere, Shareefa is probably the one who put them there. I like this song, but the video gets two boos and a hiss. It's just boring. Why do these singers keep casting Young Buck as their onscreen boyfriend? That nigga looks like he carries a zip-lock bag full of food stamps in his back pocket. He's not a dime.
BTW: Is uneven hair supposed to be cute?
Lord Take Me Now!
They should invite me to the baby shower. I just want to spread some Johnson & Johnson powder on my palm, and slap that bitch's head into the apocolypse.
Wednesday, November 01, 2006
Halloween Costume Champions
I absolutely despise Halloween, but these two foolywang bitches made the incomprehensible holiday so much more enjoyable when I saw their costumes. The homemade fivehead wig on Tisha - priceless. I always loved these girls, so I'm not suprised that they were able to supply me with a good laugh.